PICTURE this: You, a fork, a knife, and an empty chair. The cafe buzzes around you with diners in groups or pairs while you're the lone star at your table.
Are they staring at me? Are they talking about me? These two questions often pop into our minds when dining alone. Some waiters would even ask are you waiting for someone? If you're in a good mood, you would say no. If not, that waiter, be prepared. Glare is all he gets—not a word but a piercing glare. And that alone is more than enough to zip his mouth.
Dining alone is not new to me. I have been doing that when I'm between client visits the whole day or when you're out of town. I even watched a movie before—alone. Since it was a comedy, I was laughing alone. And I was ok with it.
I'm not an introvert. I love talking and being with people. But sometimes, you feel like having alone time. Alone time makes you gather your thoughts—sipping coffee and jotting down ideas for work or articles. It’s also perfect for reading a book.
When dining alone, the salt shaker and pepper grinder become conversation buddies. Suddenly, the table, once still life, becomes animated. Mr. Salt Shaker becomes your confidant. “Hey there, Mr. Salt, shake away my troubles.” And there’s Mr. Pepper Grinder, your Life Coach. “I got this, Mr. Pepper. I'm grinding those doubts.”
Have you ever done this? Or am I crazy enough to do this?
Let's imagine a menu made exclusively for solo diners: “Lone Wolf Sushi Rolls,” “Party of One Carbonara,” “Lone Ranger Burger,” or “Me-Time Mac and Cheese.”
Don't forget those food selfies, which some call food porn. It’s glamorizing your lonely planet dining experience. When seen on social media, looking lonely no more. Your table now looks like a cafe ad or a live cooking show.
But why are they staring at me? It's the social norm, Mae. People expect you to be with someone, with family or friends. Society always puts us in boxes with labels, and if we don't fit in one, they find us different, and it piques their curiosity.
It could also be that people project their fear to you—the fear of loneliness. Seeing you alone scares them. They see themselves.
Another theory could be the myth of incomplete happiness. People equate happiness to companionship or being in a relationship. What they don't realize is that being alone can sometimes be bliss.
So, the next time you feel like dining alone, embrace it and enjoy the moment. Ignore the stares. For all you know, they're envious of your freedom. Be fearless. You are challenging the status quo and writing your script, and that's power.
